What Is “Fashion,” Really?

If it is not readily apparent from what I write, and from my photo as it appears when I reply to a comment, I am a guy. Therefore, I am not generally expected to understand “fashion.” I must beg to differ. I understand “fashion” much better than most people do. It is just that my understanding of the phenomenon makes me very unlikely to indulge in it. “Fashion” is an activity started by lies, just like the War in Iraq, but “fashion” is much more pervasive. It even benefits the same people as does the war, which is to say the rich ones.

You see, “fashion” was invented by people that want to sell you things, in much the same way that Mothers Day and Fathers Day were popularized by Hallmark Cards. Fashion is the way that the manufacturers of almost everything get you to throw away perfectly good objects in favor of new ones, long before it is necessary. Probably the most recognizable of these farces of fashion is women’s clothing.

At least once per year, a group of people decide what colors women should wear this year, what length skirts should be, what ridiculous accessories should be worn, and so on, ad nauseam. A lot of this activity occurs twice, in the Spring and the Fall. Many women (though by no means all) rush out and comply with the edicts of fashion, whether they look ridiculous in the newest styles or not. Very often they do , because the styles themselves are ridiculous. Please do not confuse “fashion” with “style.” There exist some number of women with true style, generally ignoring fashion unless it perfectly suits them.

Please do not think that I am picking on the fair sex. Women and men both shop for pretty much the same reasons, but for generally different things. Men were recently caught in the fashion trap, and socially pressured to buy suits which button up to nearer their chins, making them look like imitations of Little Lord Fauntleroy, while simultaneously proving their inability to think for themselves. Needless to say, I thumbed my nose at Brooks Brothers and kept the suits I have. Besides, we’re coming into season for my camel sport coat.

Guys also do it with cars. Look at all the balding, fat, forty-year-old men preening in their snazzy little convertibles. They give me the creeps. They were almost undoubtedly driving something workable (and fancy) enough before they started having trouble with their erections and decided to compensate with a BMW Z4. Both sexes do it with home appliances and with the homes themselves. “Fashion” simply makes us get rid of perfectly good things, well before their time, so that we can buy more, thus making ourselves poorer and the already rich richer. It is hard to imagine any other activity that is more ignorant and self-damaging.

There is a common thread here, and it is vanity. Women waste clothing, men waste cars, all because we are chasing the dream that the major corporations have laid out for us, via Hollywood, which they also own. We are trying to be something that we are not. So we consume, and consume, and consume some more because we are too stupid to see what they are doing to us.

It is very much like a drug. All you have to do is Just Say no. And until you say no to fashion and fancy cars, you have no room to talk about the people who are addicted to cocaine and heroin. You are just as hooked on a drug named vanity. Get over yourselves.


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What Is “Fashion,” Really? — 1 Comment

  1. Pingback: The Kansas Curmudgeon » Blog Archive » Shopping as Sheep-like Behavior

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